At least there’s always Venus.

November 5, 2011


I’m currently in our car.

G is asleep tucked up in his car seat in the backseat.  I can just make him out, snoozing, by the light of my screen.

M is in front driving, listening to Wait Wait Don’t Tell Me.

To my right in the night sky are the moon, haloed when viewed through the car window, and the planet Venus, comfortingly bright as always.

I could use that comfort right now.

I’m having a bit of a pity party, and I’m hoping that if I get this off my chest I’ll be able to move past this and get on with things.

You see, I’m selfish.

And when you hear why I’m upset, you may just lose all respect for me.  But here goes.

I’m from California, the San Francisco bay area to be precise.  I moved to Buffalo three years ago (for excellent reasons) and have never looked back.

My parents lived, until about a week ago, near San Luis Obispo, Ca, about 6 hours south of SF if you’re obeying the speed limit.

M and I have been trying to convince my parents (and my grandmother who lives with them) to move to Buffalo ever since we moved here.  We figured that the recent arrival of G would go a long way to help our cause.

About 6 weeks ago my parents called to say they were putting the house on the market, and were moving out!  Joy!!!!


Not to Buffalo.

To Jamestown. 

Jamestown is about 1.5-3 hours away from Buffalo, depending on the traffic, amount of snow, and willingness to break the law on the Thruway.

This blew my mind.  Why Jamestown?  They don’t know anyone there… They’ve never even seen it.  It’s not like they’ve got some romantic emotional attachment or something.

I tried to convince them to move closer.  I’d had visions of being able to pop over to their place for dinner or an hour fairly often so they could play with G.  Clearly that wasn’t going to be happening if they ended up in Jamestown.

Now, the trick here is that both my mom and grandmother are disabled – my dad is the only one who can drive.  Part of the reason we wanted them closer was so that if an emergency came up, and dad for some reason was unable to drive, we’d be able to quickly swoop in and help.  That’s also more difficult with them that far away.

Regardless of that, I’m just having trouble coming to grips with the fact that my family wanted to pick up sticks, leave friends and other family (as well as the beach), move across the country, but not get just a little bit closer?!?!?!

And, before you can say “jackrabbit”, they’d put the house on the market and accepted an offer.  I’m not exaggerating… They put it on the market on a Monday, accepted the offer on Wednesday… And they hadn’t even STARTED to look for a new house yet!

In the end, despite my hardest lobbying, they put an offer on a place in Mayville, which is about 20 mins north of Jamestown, so slightly closer to Buffalo.

They just drove cross-country in an RV and are staying in a motel in Mayville until escrow closes on their new place.

On Thursday I helped my dad return the RV and rent a car that they’ll use until they can buy one.  Today we packed up G and his toys and our snacks and made the trek to the motel to welcome them to New York.

We’re on our way home now, in the dark.  3hours of driving to spend 4 hours visiting.

I know there must be something wrong with me that I’m not more excited that they’re now only an annoying drive away instead of three (count em, three) plane flights away.  I know that at some point I’ll probably be happy that we have a nice “buffer” zone between us (I’ve been told this is a very good thing to have).

I’m happy for them that they’ve found a house they seem to be happy with (though they’ll only be seeing it in-person for the first time tomorrow) in a fairly pleasant little village.

But I also dread making this drive when we have not just one, but two little ones… Or when the lake effect snow socks them in.  I know that realistically we’ll probably only see them once a month because of the logistics.  And that makes me sad.  Somehow it just seems like such a shame to have them almost-but-not-quite-close.

And there endeth the rant.  I will get past this selfish little hurt, I hope, so I can be happy for them and just be thankful they’re so much closer. 

 Thanks for listening. 🙂


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4 Comments on “At least there’s always Venus.”

  1. Jim Lewis Says:

    You moved from SF to Buffalo, on purpose? Brave. We lived in Cleveland for over ten years. Are you sure it’s a good idea to move people who love you from SF to the snow belt? But grandchildren trump all. Love your blog.


    • Venus Says:

      Indeed, I moved to Buffalo on purpose and truly love it. Seasons have got to be one of the best things ever invented since sliced bread! Also, Buffalo proper isn’t nearly as snowy as our football stadium (which is actually farther south in a lake-effect snow belt) makes it look on national TV. My parents have moved into a spot just east of Lake Erie that’s going to get them hammered though… I warned them, so now it’s on their own heads if they get buried. 😉 Thanks for the compliment, I’ll try to keep up the good work!


  2. amberpagewrites Says:

    That does seem a bit…random. My parents are talking about moving soon too. To South Carolina. 16 hours away. Where they know no one. Because getting farther away makes sense? Anyway, I understand your pity party. It’s totally understandable.


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