ok, cut the crap

February 23, 2006


Right. I actually do know why that song is stuck in my head.

we descend so easily/and give it up for short-term memory/fight your nature if you can/and hope for heaven where we land

This is about taking an action that is comfortable and indulgent instead of doing what’s (more than likely) best. This is specifically about me kissing someone I’m not dating anymore. Not that that’s bad in and of itself (he’s a fantastic kisser). Just that it’s the tip of the proverbial slippery slope.

We kissed because it was so easy to descend into that familiarity. Swept up in short-term memories of a lovely evening with dinner and dancing — instead of thinking about why we’re not dating any more. Not really being able to fight our nature — or just not wanting to.

And I really am hoping for heaven. A safe understanding (whatever that is) where everyone’s comfortable, happy, and satisfied.

Speaking of comfortable. It’s the Comfortable Sweatshirt Syndrome. I wish I could take credit for inventing that phrase! Anyway — it’s the premise that you have that Comfortable Sweatshirt that you won’t get rid of. It’s a little out of style, a little frayed at the edges. But it’s comforting, not just comfortable. You have newer sweatshirts, and you give them a token wear a few times a month. But it’s the Comfortable Sweatshirt that you want to crawl into when you’re watching TV on the couch at home. I don’t think I need to elaborate on the obvious parallels to relationships with exes.

I think it might be a while before I get the song, and kissing Comfortable-Sweatshirt-Guy (damn! it was nice…), out of my head.

*tired smile*


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